I Have Cancer, Am I Going to Die?
By Kenny Perkins, All Talk Oncology
Kevin Perkins, Founder & host of All Talk Oncology Cancer Podcast and Cancer Coach
Imagine this: life is moving along as usual, and then one word changes everything: cancer. It's a diagnosis no one ever expects, and suddenly, you are thrown into a whirlwind of emotions, questions, and fears. But here is something I have learned in my 20 years of working in the cancer industry as a radiation therapist and cancer coach: cancer may change your life overnight, but it doesn't have to define it. Through mindset shifts, support systems, and a strong sense of purpose, you can take control of your journey, even when it feels impossible. Let me show you how.
When life hands you one of the toughest battles, it's not just your body being tested; your spirit and mental resilience are, too. And that's where your mindset comes in. What if I told you your mindset could make all the difference in how you handle cancer? It's true. Instead of focusing on simply surviving, lean into the idea of thriving. Celebrate the small wins, whether it's finishing a round of treatment or just getting out of bed on a hard day. Progress over perfection is key. Every time you choose to find strength in the struggle, you not only inspire yourself but also those around you. It's a ripple effect; hope is contagious.
But navigating your cancer journey isn't just about thinking positively. It's about taking practical steps and building a strong support system. Here is the truth: cancer isn't a solo journey. You need a team. Think of it like assembling your very own all-star lineup—friends, family, doctors, and even support groups who have your back. But let's get real for a second: not everyone knows how to support you. They may unintentionally say the wrong thing, or withdraw when you need them the most. That's why it's essential to surround yourself with people who show up, bring you meals, listen without judgment, and make you feel seen. And do not underestimate the importance of finding a medical team that truly listens to you. A doctor who respects your choices and encourages second opinions can make all the difference in your journey.
Another critical element in facing cancer is finding your purpose. Why are you fighting? It is one of the biggest questions you will need to ask yourself, and it's one worth answering. Your "why" is the foundation of your purpose, and it will keep you moving forward when the road feels impossible. For some, it’s family, the thought of being there for their kids' milestones. For others, it's unfinished business, like a dream they still want to chase. Whatever your "why" is, write it down. Keep it close. On days when life feels overwhelming, let it remind you of what you are fighting for. This purpose isn't just motivation; it's an anchor, grounding you when the waves of fear and uncertainty try to pull you under.
Likewise, a huge source of anxiety for many cancer patients is fear of the unknown. "I have cancer. Am I going to die?" It's the question that echoes in every patient's mind and hearing the word "cancer" can feel like your whole world has been turned upside down. It's normal to feel scared. But this is what I want you to know: cancer doesn't define you. What you do next does. Start by taking a deep breath. Acknowledge your emotions, fear, anger, and sadness because bottling them up does not help. Then, I want you to start focusing on what you can control. Learn about your diagnosis, ask your medical team questions, and don't hesitate to get a second opinion. Treatments like chemotherapy and radiation might feel overwhelming, but they are tools to help you. Preparation and understanding can ease your fears. Yes, side effects like fatigue or hair loss might challenge you, but these are temporary. However, the strength that you will gain through this process; that is permanent. If surgery is part of your treatment plan, know this: preparing isn't just about your body but also about your mind and spirit. Having a trusted support person by your side and maintaining a positive outlook can make the experience feel like a step toward healing rather than a setback.
Cancer is an emotional rollercoaster, and while you may experience stages like denial, anger, bargaining, sadness, and eventually acceptance, these stages don't always follow a neat or straight path. Something that most people don't talk about is cancer is an emotional rollercoaster. Denial might feel like a shield, but avoiding reality delays the help you need. Anger and sadness are normal, but holding onto them can weigh you down. Grief is part of the process, but if sadness turns into depression it is important to seek out professional help. And acceptance? It's not about liking the situation but finding a way to live fully in the moment. With the proper mindset and support, you will find yourself moving forward, even on those difficult days.
A real-life example of this journey is Lori's story. Lori is a woman whose world changed overnight when she found a lump in her breast. "I have breast cancer," she said, as tears began to stream down her face. Lori felt lost, unsure and alone, not knowing where to turn. She asked herself, “Who do I talk to? Where do I go? What do I do?” She remembers being overwhelmed and scared at one of her doctor visits and she broke down. That's when I met her. I immediately asked, "Would you like a hug?" That small moment of connection was a significant turning point for Lori. I introduced her to my podcast, All Talk Oncology, where she found stories of resilience and hope. Slowly, Lori began to feel less alone. I introduced her to my program: “I Have Cancer. Am I Going To Die.” Moreover, through coaching, she learned how to take control of her journey. "It helped me put things into perspective," she told me. Today, Lori faces each day with a strength she didn't know she had.
Throughout this journey, there are tools that can help you regain control and rebuild confidence. In addition, cancer does not just impact patients; it affects families and caregivers, too. That is why I have created resources to support everyone involved. My book, The 5 Stages of Winning with a Cancer Diagnosis, offers step-by-step guidance. My podcast, All Talk Oncology, brings real-life stories and practical advice that empowers cancer patients, reinforces confidence and certainty about their cancer condition.
Cancer is tough, but so are you. It's okay to feel afraid, but do not let that fear define you. With the right mindset, a strong support system, and a sense of purpose, you can transform fear into strength. My challenge to you is this: take it one step at a time. Build your all-star team and hold onto your "why.” And please, always remember, you are not alone in this. We are in this together.
